so aimless, no clear sense of direction. just living each day as it comes. there's so many paths to take, so many different directions, turn left, right, hump ahead, whatever. but i know in my life the U-turn sign doesn't exist cos once a decision is made, stick to it. the best i can do to make the journey a more pleasant one is not to take another wrong turn, which sadly, i have, many times.

right now i just need a SIGN. a gigantic, enormous, obvious sign to tell me which way to go. im totally lost. in various aspects. like a headless chicken. actually there are signs, but i just duno which way. and i know sometimes life is all about taking risks, trying things out. but im not advanturous and i don't like taking risks.

maybe i should just leave everything to God. i tink what i lack now is him. ive to admit that there were many instances he had definitely & clearly shown me the right path to take, and had walked hand in hand with me. but i was the one who let go of his hand and took on the journey on my own. the verse which says ask & it will be given to you, seek & you will find, knock and it will be open to you, has many times proved itself. that if i entrust all my troubles, burdens, worries to God & ask him to make a way for me, he will. i tink it has come to a point i can't rely on myself anymore, i suck at making decisions, i suck at many things actually. and the onli thing for me to do now is to trust that he'll make a way for me. and it reali takes ALOT of faith & trust to do that. and i gota help myself too.

tired. need strength. motivation. onli God can provide.