i absolutely hate the feeling of not being able to control situations. i wish i could do something to help. but you are not allowing me to help at all. im torn. im confused. upset. exasperated. paranoid. nope, it's definitely NOT pms this time. and the frustrating thing is i don't even know wad the crux of the matter is! am i over-reacting? u kept emphasizing it's not cos of me. then wad exactly is it? half of me am reali reali worried & concerned. but it's affecting my concentration to study. i can't let anything get in the way of my revision now. augh. do i have to make choices now? if i leave it, im sure the problem whatever it is will resurface again.

i need sleep. shall try to sleep it away. i dun wana face it now. it's too upsetting.